Awe…good hello. So happy you’re here. I’m quite delusional for the scope of what I thought I could create, what I thought the potential was, and what I thought was possible with all that potential. As it is with my albums, I considered every aspect of my work interconnected, and pushed hard to force a commitment to story within art within science within thought all bound to effort. Just out here doing the next most beautiful thing I can think to do…
Let’s just take it from the near top, then…
There is something that comes before the art, the music, the authoring, the strangeness of my personal expression: The Ethos, Logos, and Pathos that form the concept of Fairytale Science which is the method used to express SiDimQui. Don’t worry, a little reading and you’ll catch up just fine. For now though, let’s begin with the music, shall we…
Music
Just begin listening while you read on…
I could never have planned how this all would go; the depth that was created was more a result of showing up and experiencing ‘ah-ha’ and ‘oh my’ moments repeatedly than it was of any kind of genius pre-course; the methods of recycling lyrics, melodies, structures, and binding them to a single storyline came from showing up over and over – simple as that. It was a brilliance at first, and something I became addicted to. And then I wanted to take it all further and further, and go until it broke my mind.
Although my mind has never fully broken, my Spirit has and I am eternally grateful that a Spirit knows how to heal – especially when there is music involved. See, I always thought it was both the thing that caused all the problems in my life, and the thing that also saved my life. It turns out, as a friend has gifted me a piece of her own insight, that it is only that it has saved me.
A couple of things now…Instruments. My music has always had a way about it, and so has my art and the way I see the world, so it became more and more important that the instruments I was playing live, writing songs on, and recording my music with belonged to my own hands and their ability to craft reality from thought and desire. Also for my hands to learn how to play all the strings proficiently enough to be rewarded with recorded music that is played well with continued merit in the composition. I wanted my songs to be songs themselves. *That concept has grown – The Red Rocks story becomes important here. But for now, carry on, I suppose. There is a lot to this story, after all.
Instruments
I didn’t really know where I was going, I only knew that what guided me was a feeling beyond my own self’s determining decisions that suggested meaningful intention with the forward direction. Could that be said in an easier more approachable way? Yeah, but not gonna.
When I first became serious about the possibilities of instrument making, I projected in nearly every possible direction. Nothing really stuck. After walking an idea-path for a while, my feeling of ‘rightness’ would fade. I’m pretty good at listening to those things and diving into some sort of recoursing. Mostly, in the beginning, I just wanted to experiment, develop understanding for the mechanisms of instruments and their physics, and push the boundaries of expression in art. I did this in unbelievable ways and with a relentlessness that few would understand or make space for.
Anyhow, there is a lot more information and crazy instrument connected stories on the instrument page, so zoom on over there.
Author
In the mix of my first memories that pertain to the ideas I developed about this life and what I wanted to do with it was to be an author. It’s a wonder to me that I refused language, symantics, and play when I was young. My life, and where it went, however, would lead me to a place of desire. This desire was to become masterful at revealing these most complicated thoughts in an understandable way and spoken/written way. What happened though was not that simple. Out of this personal desire, and not through any path of learning from others, did I pursue this method of expression and pushed to continually add clarifying architecture so as to describe the picture more wholly. It was somewhere on the way that I discovered an ability to create greater interplay – or – play within the complete potential of expression. What the heck does that mean?
I don’t really know. Ok, I have an idea. For example, my book, Mozzy’s Cart, takes the lyrics, ideas, and concepts I’ve written, learned, and put into practice and places them into a composition of fiction. I have some other works too that aren’t published, but they deal with the nature of reality. Does the world really need another book on this? Perhaps not, but a friend of mine suggested that it is important because someone who has the thoughts but hasn’t found their voice yet might need to borrow my own. It’s rather beautiful.
It felt important in my own personal study of consciousness that I don’t simply observe and attempt to create frameworks around these observations, but that I create experiments to push the conscious mind into other states of information.
For example, a few years back I sat in the complete pitch black in a hole in the ground on the island where I live for 7 days with 4 of those days spent fasting. It’s quite an experience, especially in such an extreme. Although powerful, I wouldn’t recommend it to very many people. Maybe a comfortable kind of dark retreat, but not this. What I would recommend: full isolation for a five day period.
I did a full isolation for 30 days, and what I would tell you about that, especially in today’s culture, is that it was one of the most beautiful experiences. I’ll write about these experiences, and if you are curious about any of them and want to discuss any matter further, I’d love to do just that.